Friday, November 20, 2009

another art class...

...and another great night out with Emily!
Here is what I painted last night.

I am addicted.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Rolling on the FLOOR!

I got this email this afternoon and I just HAD to share it.
This does hit close to home.....

Dear Diary,

For my birthday this year, I purchased a week of personal training at the local health club.

Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Christo, who identified himself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear.

Friends seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.



Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Christo waiting for me. He is something of a Greek god-- with blond hair, dancing eyes, and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!!

Christo gave me a tour and showed me the machines... I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which he conducted his aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring!

Christo was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time he was around. This is going to be a FANTASTIC week!!



I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Christo made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air then he put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. His rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel GREAT! It's a whole new life for me.



The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn't try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot.

Christo was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members.. His voice is a little too perky for that early in the morning and when he scolds, he gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying.

My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Christo put me on the stair monster. Why the hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Christo told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. He said some other crap too.



Butt hole was waiting for me with his vampire-like teeth exposed as his thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn't help being a half an hour late-- it took me that long to tie my shoes.

He took me to work out with dumbbells. When he was not looking, I ran and hid in the restroom. He sent some skinny witch to find me.

Then, as punishment, he put me on the rowing machine-- which I sank.



I hate that jackass Christo more than any human being has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world. Stupid, skinny, anemic, anorexic, little aerobic instructor. If there was a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat him with it.

Christo wanted me to work on my triceps. I don't have any triceps! And if you don't want dents in the floor, don't hand me the darn barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich.

The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn't it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?



Satan left a message on my answering machine in his grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing his voice made me want to smash the machine with my planner; however, I lacked the strength to even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the Weather Channel..



I'm having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year my husband will choose a gift for me that is fun-- like a root canal or a hysterectomy. I still say if God had wanted me to bend over, he would have sprinkled the floor with diamonds!!!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Monday, November 9, 2009

Major. League. Yum.

Last night Zach and I cooked dinner together.

We cooked Ribeye steaks
(from the 1/2 cow we purchased, YAY for organic meat)
 Twice Baked Potatoes

I am off to do about a million crunches now.....

It was so good.
I think I will have leftover carrots with my sandwich for lunch today :)
Ya'll try that recipe. You wont be disappointed, I promise!

Saturday, November 7, 2009

i love rainbows

((especially double rainbows))
...and we found this one in Auburn last week.
Isn't it pretty?

Friday, November 6, 2009

I just ran across this picture and I had to post it.
I love this girl!!!!!!!

Where have I been???

i just realized how LONG it has been since i posted.
well, in my defense, we have been out of town for the last two weeks.
first, to watch the tigers kick booty on halloween.
then, to ohio. the kids and i accompanied zach on a business trip.
what is there to do in ohio you ask???
...but there may have been an indoor pool and hot tub at the hotel we stayed at.
The kids were as adorable as ever on Halloween.
Aubree was Dorothy and Griffin was the Cowardly Lion.
Their costumes were handmade by Zach's grandmother.
She did an amazing job!
I had to take Griffin to the doctor yesterday.
He has been "cruddy" (like my new word?) for like 2 months now.
Turns out he STILL has an ear infection. We are trying another antiobiotic to see if it helps.
Not much else to report....enjoy a few pictures from the past week or two!

She was so proud of her red shoes.....

Isnt he a doll???

War Eagle......Zach and I at the Auburn game.